How Funny Is John McCain?
The Politico refers to his humor as “sharp, unrehearsed, and way, way over the line.” McCain says he doesn’t recall telling this one, although it was reported by the Tucson Citizen during is 1986 Senate campaign.
“Did you hear the one about the woman who is attacked on the street by a gorilla, beaten senseless, raped repeatedly and left to die? When she finally regains consciousness and tries to speak, her doctor leans over to hear her sigh contently and to feebly ask, ‘Where is that marvelous ape?’”
McCain had to apologize for this 1998 ditty:
“Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly?” he asked guests at a Senate Republican fundraiser. “Because her father is Janet Reno.”
This one wasn’t a joke…just a Freudian slip?
…during his 1986 campaign, he referred to a retirement community called “Leisure World” as “Seizure World.”
He recently referred to exporting cigarettes to Iran as “a way of killing ‘em.”
And who can forget this golden oldie?
[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=hAzBxFaio1I]
Alan, so you will readily excuse the New Yorker for its cover (which I actually agree with you about) but not these jokes by McCain? I think the Chelsea Clinton one was a bit of low blow but other than that what the heck is wrong with a little humor?
Reagan Outlaws Russia…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zv13ZnkpWos
July 17th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
“how funny is john mccain?”
i thought alan was telling a joke when i read that…
these quotes are not funny at all. they’re quite distasteful and nasty. he apparently doesn’t have the ability to be funny, just to be a sarcastic jerk.
July 17th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
McCain’s humor is politically incorrect and it requires a person with special tastes, but Rev. Wright’s and Father Pflegler’s humor is far more in your face than McCain. Bomb Iran and G-D America don’t compare. That Pflegler Hillary line was a bit funny if you like satire and irony. She called herself “Inevitable.”
July 17th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
@Cecil Jones
McCain’s humor is less of an issue than his age, which is also less of an issue than the policies he’d pursue as POTUS.
So long as the electorage reduces politics to a mashup of sports and sitcoms, we’re doomed, doomed, doomed.
But the interwebs may lead us to thought.
July 17th, 2008 at 4:57 pm
“Bomb Iran and G-D America don’t compare. ”
And that one of these remarks came out of the mouth of a candidate who apparently thinks it’s funny is why they don’t compare.
The remark about Chelsea I find incomprehensible.
July 17th, 2008 at 5:25 pm
And come to think of it, the gorilla joke is like saying rape: relax and enjoy.
Not funny.
July 17th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
But now I understand McCain calling his wife the C-word.
July 17th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Oh, now, RC, that last post was inappropriate humor! JUST like John McCain! It actually made me chuckle so it must be evil. Alan needs to make a post called “How Funny Is RC?”
July 17th, 2008 at 8:40 pm
What’s sad is that I don’t like McCain as my candidate, but a comic I think Lewis Black jokes about how we need a crazy president to make our enemies worried, like Reagan. Maybe he’s right. Or was that someone else. Black says we need to show them how crazy we the citizens are. Elect a dead president.
July 17th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
lol, LV
July 17th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
McCain was victimized by the racists Vietnamese communists and deprived of his god given equal opportunity by a suppressive system. The hate of the anti-war movement made him question himself everyday and despise his past culture which had been deprived by a barbaric practice degenerating his accomplishments as less than human. You will never understand what it was like because you are a draft dodging post smoking liberal, you don’t know what its like to have to live with the stigma of being hated for what you are. This speech is only improper because of people taking it out of context and not realizing the pain it refers to.
If the excuses don’t work for Jeremiah Wright or Michael Pfleger then stop using a double standard for these fabrications against McCain just because you are a kool aid drinking communist. FUCK YOU ALAN COLMES.
July 17th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
what a twisted last posting by david duke — just like in KKK — along with the childish perhaps psyhcotic FU.
I GIVE YOU A NEW COMMANDMENT: TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER
(source of that quote = ? …. )
July 17th, 2008 at 11:59 pm
How dare you quote scripture at me you liberal idiot. When Shakespeare said “the devil quotes scripture when it suits his purposes” he was talking about communist control freaks like YOU. You would ban all religious display of sincere faith because you hate the culture of compassion and greatness that made our people great, and would replace it with nothing but self doubt and skepticism to follow the fools who you set up as leaders with their false pagan religions of multiculturalism and junk science of impending apocalypse. There is no difference between the Zionists seeking to occupy Palestine and the mental illness of global warming and requiring humans to return to a medieval standard of living ever since Reagan defeated the overt socialists.
John McCain is a mistaken immigrant lover who betrays his nations by eradicating its borders, but unlike the sniveling cowards like Alan Colmes and yourself he defended his nation from the oppressors and suffered for his native land. And after the liberals destroyed the honor that is due to our veterans, they now require we worship the hucksters and hatred filled extortionists like Jesse Jackson and Jeremiah Wright who demonstrate their hypocrisy and destructiveness constantly. Alan Colmes is an apologist for terrorists and criminals, and I am not limiting that to those who are violent thieves – cultural assassins are in fact more damaging because lethal force is not permitted. Except in the war of ideas, where you liberals seek to impose your censorship and warped amorality of relativism.
FUCK YOU ALL, but ESPECIALLY Alan “Traitor” Colmes.
July 18th, 2008 at 12:49 am
“…you liberal idiot…you hate the culture of compassion and greatness that made our people great…FUCK YOU ALL…”
Compassion: sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it. –Merriam Webster 11th Collegiate Dictionary
July 18th, 2008 at 2:39 am
flap: well, what can I say? I’ve never applied the C-word to anyone, and I’ve never joked about rape, and I’ve never joked about someone being ugly, and I think less of McCain as a man because he’s done all three.
And, to tell the truth, McCain begins to remind me of Top Gun, the movie, and fighter jock Tom Cruise, who’s just blazing a path to glory on his journey through life, and if he bruises a few egos along the way it isn’t his problem, because he’s the best who ever was.
A talented technician lacking any depth of intellect.
July 18th, 2008 at 2:50 am
From Katie Halper:
The McCain Loyalty Oath for Women
I _______________ pledge to transfer my support from Hillary Clinton to John McCain. I agree to do all I can do to get McCain the vote. In order to achieve this noble goal I promise to support McCain’s…
• fight to overturn Roe v. Wade and my right to choose.
• fight against equal pay for men and women.
• opposition to providing low-income and uninsured women and families with health care services ranging from breast and cervical cancer screening to birth control.
• opposition to sex education and support of abstinence-only education.
• opposition to insurance covering birth control.
• endorsement of women’s rights more “in theory” than in practice.
• pet name for his wife.
As a woman I promise to apply McCain’s principles to my own life and vow to…
• call myself and my female friends the C word.
• picket abortion clinics.
• not use contraceptives.
• drink bleach so I don’t catch HIV and drink Mountain Dew so I don’t get pregnant.
• give back part of my salary to male coworkers.
• not vote, but pursue education and encourage my father/husband/brother male friends to vote for McCain.
Once McCain is elected, I will continue to support him and I will not complain about my losing my right to choose, and other reproductive freedoms. And I will continue to refrain from pursuing equality for women.
Signature ____________
July 18th, 2008 at 7:17 am
McCain will not remove the right to kill you leftist trash. Its so funny that you accuse conservatives of using abortion as a wedge issue when you are hyperventilating over it ever since women have declared their support against Obama the Marxist.
The conservatives have held pro-life positions for twenty-three years since the passage of Roe v. Wade, seven of the nine justices on the Supreme Court were appointed in Republican administrations, and the law will never be overturned. Never.
It exists because the liberals are racist eugenicists and Planned Parenthood, founded by Nazi sympathizer Margaret Sanger who gave an honorary award to Adolf Hitler, want to eradicate the minority population. The greatest act ever performed by Satan was convincing the world he didn’t exist, and nothing is greater evidence of this fact than the black communities’ wholesale support for a ruling intended to purposefully control their population. Explain the stagnation of their demographic at 12 percent since 1980 if you disagree, the cheap labor of hispanics never would have dominated and displaced them from service employment without that ghastly ruling. Tell me who the divisive racists are in reality, you cannot admit it. You liberals do not care about American citizens, especially if they are minorities, in favor of the illegal alien. And you certainly don’t concern yourselves with the rights of women as evidenced by the left wing media that denigrated an accomplished female candidate who has been a committed liberal socialist in favor of an unproven black man who has advanced even more atrocious legalization of ghastly abortionist practices to kill even more children. You should be ashamed of yourselves for the deceit you have promulgated, it is sickening to hear a eugenicist like Alan Colmes argue a fetus has no legal rights when sonograms and ultrasounds and amniocentesis treatments have long proven otherwise. The atrocious living standards of inner city populations have been governed by the Democratic establishment consecutively for decades. You hate equality and are only interested in passing laws that will profit trial lawyers and activist groups and will do nothing to benefit all Americans as equal people.
July 18th, 2008 at 9:10 am
I REALLY am beginning to believe that people like Jury Farewell and david duke are liberals posing as conservatives to make them look foolish!
July 18th, 2008 at 10:05 am
I think it’s one Republican operative posting under several different names.
July 18th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
RC:
I think you’re right!
July 18th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
I am not RNC operative, I am the prophet speaking the holy word of the Lord God Almighty! I disassociate myself with the liberal Republican party who is complicit in the destruction of this sacred nation in favor of abortionist judges, permitting socialist litigation, and permitting the removal of the sacred Scripture from the public sphere. Absolutely nothing has changed under Bush the deciever, no conservative American, an accomplice who never criticizes the left wing establishment and has erected the methodology for complete government control when the far left liberals usurp power by the delusion that it was conservatives who depleted this country’s strength rather than corporate socialists. I see the lies of Hannity every night in accord with the demonic Colmes who speaks for the destruction of freedom and moral authority, both decievers and liars ushering in the globalist order of Satan. You all have become fooled by the godless cult of pantheism in order to usher in the age of those of the world to bring for the End Days by the dark claw of the ANTICHRIST!
I speak the holy truth before being led to martyrdom by your corruption, it is predicted by the Apocrypha of the seven angels of Asia.
July 18th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Jury Farewell:
Now why would a kind and loving God send a prophet as hateful and vindictive prophet as you to spread His word? Perhaps those voices in your head are from Satan.
July 18th, 2008 at 4:41 pm
The angry rebellious and proud have always rejected the word. I am merely preaching what is good and just, and it has always been the speaker of the word who is persecuted. But you all notice the evil that has befallen our nation and yet persist in continuing your sinful and proud rejection of what is good because of your worship of self and pursuit of indulgence. I am not afraid, I know what my fate shall be and for those who have ears let them hear. He has given you eyes with which you do not see.
July 18th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
Prefessional help is available for nuts jobs like this. Too bad they don’t realize they are crazy.
July 18th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
He has given you eyes with which you do not see.
by Jury Farewell
This was true for awhile but then I got contact lenses and glasses so things are much clearer now. Thanks for your concern.
July 18th, 2008 at 9:02 pm
Epiphany- LOL!
July 18th, 2008 at 9:13 pm