Christine O’Donnell’s Lust For Victory Pays Off! (Satire)
by Thomas Wellborn
A celebratory Christine O’Donnell stroked her supporters with praise on the night of her climactic win in Delaware’s Republican Senate primary, satisfying her lust for victory. This leaves no doubt that she has her finger pressed firmly on the pulse of her many supporters’ desires.
At the same time, Republican Party leaders were visibly shaking their heads as tight control of the Senate was slipping out of their once firm grasp – Therein lay the rub, so it seems.
Speaking on Fox News on Tuesday night, Karl Rove said the political newcomer doesn’t “evince the characteristics of rectitude and sincerity and character that the voters are looking for,” adding “there’s just a lot of nutty things she’s been saying.”
O’Donnell awkwardly stroked off Rove’s remarks, saying, “It’s a shame. He is the same so-called political guru that predicted I wasn’t going to win.”
She went on to express how impressed she was at the size of her win, alluding to eating pie: “And we won, and we won big. So I think he is eating some humble pie and trying to restore his reputation,” she told ABC in response.
O’Donnell said that while she’d love the magic caress of establishment Republicans, she is more than capable of taking care of herself if they refuse to rise to the occasion. Following Tuesday’s noticeably icy reception, however, some Republicans showed some signs of heating up to her on Wednesday.
Democrats consider the win to be very advantageous for them. O’Donnell can come as many times as she likes as it seems to hold the Republicans at bay.Click here for reuse options!
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