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Name: Suzanne
Nickname: Trouble
Member since: 2009-05-08 02:39:59
Website URL: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1756281986
About me: I am the most powerful and interesting woman in the world. My mere gaze reflects microwaves. I eat non-dairy creamer for breakfast. I can divide the square root of Pi by zero. I rip staples out of letters with my teeth. I’ve watched 'The Notebook' without shedding so much as one tear. I give metermaids parking tickets. Florescent lights cease flickering in my presence. My white-out never clumps. People ask me where stuff is in Home Depot. I can change the TV channel with my mind. I kick stingrays. My beer is never flat. I will entrance you with my awesomeness. Heroin overdoses on me. Nigerian spammers send me money via certified check. Real checks. Issued by the International Bank of You Da Chick. I’m more flexible than a Romanian gymnast, More absorbent than a Sham Wow, Sharper than obsidian. Fuck Chuck Norris. He’s got nothing on me.

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User comments

Now We Know What Sarah Palin Reads: It's Newsmax

November 19th, 2009 at 5:59 pm

hey I read newsmax…and other stuff too like the enquirer..whats wrong with that???humm Alan?

Pure, Raw, Right-Wing Obama Hatred

November 18th, 2009 at 5:43 pm

Um, dont we have bigger issues than this we got to save?

McCain/Palin Aide Nicole Wallace: Palin Account Is "Fiction"

November 18th, 2009 at 5:40 pm

Even if she did tell Palin that, do you think shed admit it and suffer career suicide? This is a she said-she said. Her book is telling her side and evening the score about the election. Many others have done this. I dont understand why Palin is getting this much press.

On Tuesday's Radio Show...

November 17th, 2009 at 9:23 pm

Why do they always start with womens issues?

Rudy Stays On Message

November 17th, 2009 at 8:24 pm

LOL Thats my fave biden line ever.

To GOP, Bowing: Not Okay; Kissing And Hand-Holding: Okay

November 17th, 2009 at 12:19 am

Yeah, but what I wanna know if he got slipped the toungue…. ;)

Rudy Stays On Message

November 17th, 2009 at 12:13 am

Bidens 3 letter word: J_O_B_S! Pot Kettle Black.

Rudy: "I Think Sarah Palin Is Great For The Republican Party"

November 16th, 2009 at 1:53 am

Oh she is great for the GOP party…….If youre a Democrat…lol

Carrie Prejean Angrily Takes Off Microphone In Middle Of Larry King Interview

November 12th, 2009 at 11:08 pm

I dont understand if King knew the terms of the interview he ambushed her. I dont think that is cool to do to a guest at all, altho I do think she is hypocritical because she spills out a ton of information on HANNITY then places restrictions on other interviewers which is bizarre.

Carrie Prejean Claims She Was Pressured To Get New Breasts

November 9th, 2009 at 11:41 pm

I hate it when someone pressures me to get fake boobs and pays for it. DAMN THE LIFE!!!

What a nitwit.

Congressman John Shadegg Uses Chief-Of-Staff's Daughter As Prop

November 8th, 2009 at 7:56 am

I think next time he needs to use a sock puppet instead…

Freekin Az..

Suspected Fort Hood Shooter Called "Camel Jockey" By Military Colleagues

November 6th, 2009 at 6:03 pm

Well those military can be salty. Not that I condone such language..